Dreams of a lego spaceman...

This is the official page of author Duane Gundrum. It is also the portal for the comic strip The Adventures of Stickman and the Unemployed Legospaceman.

Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Spiderpig

Okay, I'm going to come straight out and say that The Simpson's Movie was a great movie. A friend of mine took me to see it, as she felt I needed to get out of the house. If you've seen the trailer for this, you've probably heard Homer Simpson singing his song "Spiderpig", which is done to the tune of the old Spiderman cartoon. I chuckled a bit when I saw the trailer, and I thought it would be just a slightly amusing thing. Well, let's just say this is one of those movies where a lot of thought went into some very tiny details. I recommend that you watch the WHOLE thing because there are some moments to this movie where you just have to be there to experience it. I give it very high ratings.



Countdown: 364 days

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Nope...no waiting lists in the USA for health care

The doctor that had me have an xray called me back today and told me she was referring me to a specialist. Turns out the first appointment I can make with a Kaiser specialist for my shoulder/arm is August 23rd. In other words, buck up little trooper and live with the pain for another three weeks before we let you see someone who will then order more tests and then have you wait even longer.

Yes, health care in this country is quite up to speed to all those third world countries like Canada and Europe.



Countdown: 364 days

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The Countdown

I've decided to create a fun countdown, using today as a good starting point, for one year. I've realized that I've been wasting most of my life, and what I've really wanted all of my life is to be a writer, and it's never really happened for me. Instead, I'm really not taken seriously as a writer or as anything else for that matter. So, I've decided to give myself a year, 365 days to achieve my goal of being successful as a writer. Well, actually, my goals are going to be:

1. Receive an advance of $10,000 or more for one of my novels/books, which is the average advance a writer receives for a first book.

2. Get an actual job that's a real job. Not some part time job. Not some temp job. Not some job that's going to eventually one day, possibly, with lots of luck and flowery dispositions, lead to some future job that doesn't exist yet. A real job that I'll be able to work at as a career, not some placeholder until I find something better because I'm getting older, and I just don't see that happening.

3. An actual life partner. Although to be honest, this last one is not even going to be my main focus because if one of the other ones doesn't come forth this year, then I'm not sure this one is really going to be enough.

So, what does this all mean? Well, I'm giving myself 365 days, August 1st, 2008, to make it happen.

It's kind of ironic because I read an article in the San Francisco Chronicle this morning about how they've crunched statistics on people who jump off the Golden Gate Bridge. It turns out that these people tend to be EXACTLY like me, except they're a year younger than me. Exactly like me.

So, my thought is this. If by August 1st, 2008, I don't have one of those things happening in my life, I'm joining the statistics. I'll be keeping a running countdown on the blog from this point forward, mainly to remind myself more than anything else because not too many people read my blog anyway. Hell, not too many people read ANYTHING of mine anyway, and I guess that's part of the problem.

But anyway....


Countdown: 365 days

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Monday, July 30, 2007

The perpetual arm problem

I'm still trying to get something done about my arm/shoulder. It's amazing how hard it is to actually get something done about it. I know Michael Moore's Sicko is all about how the health industry has its problems, but one of the biggest criticisms of the movie is that it focuses on foreign health programs and forgets to mention the long waiting lists people have to endure to receive care. Well, we have those, too. We just don't acknowledge them. I'll give you an example. Seeing my doctor was hard enough, considering she got injured and there's no way for me to know that, so NO ONE gets back to me when I'm trying to arrange an appointment. So, I have to arrange an appointment with some random doctor who is tasked with taking her clients, although no one knows she is tasked to do it, and there's nothing in place to let any clients know this.

So, I finally get to see her, and what I need is an MRI. I know this. My sister, the nurse, knows this. The homeless guy who hangs out at Carls Jr. knows this. But it seems that no one in Kaiser knows this. So, they first give me medication that doesn't work. So, a month goes by. I say I'm still in serious pain. They give me more medication. That still doesn't work. So I say I'm still in serious pain. They give me a cordizone (spelling?) shot. Helps for about a day, then the pain returns. They then give me medication. I keep asking for an MRI. Nope. Must go the process. Four months later, and about four hours of sleep later because of the throbbing pain each and every night, this strange doctor tells me I must have a referral to a doctor who can order an MRI, but before I can get this referral, I have to have an Xray done. Okay, that was Friday. Can't seem to get ahold of anyone as of Monday. So, that's where I am. Over 4 months have passed, and I'm still in serious, throbbing pain. And I still can't get referred to the guy who can order an MRI, THE ONE THING I NEED.

Krista and I broke up today. It was inevitable. I saw it coming some time ago because I realized that she was making too many sacrifices to be with me, and she didn't deserve that. She deserves better, and I wish her well.

I've been trying to get back into the swing of writing. It's been really hard because my place is somewhat trashed, and it's hard working around all of that. I spent a good portion of today just looking at the crap around the apartment before realizing I wasn't going to do anything to make it cleaner, so I ended up just puttering around the house most of the day.

I've decided to give up on finding a job. It's not worth the effort. It has cost me more money this summer trying to find a job than if I had stuck it out at home hiding behind my futon. I realize that there's really only one way I'm going to have a chance to become part of real civilization, and that's for my writing career to get moving. I'm giving it a year (the time I have left for school before I pick up my second MA). If I don't make it by then, I may just end it all right then and there. I'm figuring on a running jump off the Golden Gate Bridge, but from the opposite side as no one ever jumps from that side, and I'd like my end to at least be somewhat nonconformist.

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Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Temp job didn't work out

I really should have known better. So, two days worth of wasted gas and really nothing to show for it. Woke up at 5am to get to a job that wasn't really there.

Why do I even try any more?
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Sunday, July 22, 2007

Temp job

I should be starting a temp job tomorrow morning. I'm not exactly sure how long it is supposed to last, but my understanding is that the hours are 8am to 5pm, Monday through Friday. It's essentially a glorified data entry position, but the pay is okay, and as we all know, I need money desperately. We'll see how long it lasts after I get there and find out a little more about it. It's in Pleasanton, which means it's quite a trip to get there, but again, beggars can't really be choosers sometimes.

Unfortunately, my shoulder hasn't been getting any better, and even with some medication, it's just overly painful sometimes.

That's pretty much it for now.

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Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Preying on the poor

As many of you may know, times are kind of tough right now financially, so I've been exploring all sorts of alternative methods of survival in hopes of increasing revenue (or starting some) in hopes of making it through the rest of this summer. It hasn't been easy, and I've not been extremely successful, but one thing that it has done is remind me of how vicious other people can be when it comes to taking advantage of those with little to no resources.

Let me move back a bit in the past to orchestrate an event that happened that opened my eyes to this sort of behavior. Years back, I was in really dire financial circumstances after having gotten out of the Army and unable to figure out what to do with the rest of my life. So, I ended up in San Francisco, and I lived in the impoverished area of the Tenderloin District. I was working security guard jobs for extremely limited income (I made too much to qualify for food stamps, but not enough to pay rent, let alone actually buy food). I had a dollar or so one day and decided my best bet was to buy a carton of milk (you could get a quart of milk for 99 cents back then, and that was overpriced). So I went to the normal corner convenient store that was owned by a Korean family. Their 18-19 year old kid was working that day, and I put the 99 cent quart of milk on the counter. The kid looked at this "tax chart" he had that covered the entire main counter and then said: "That will be $1.34." I almost paid it, but then it suddenly dawned on me that 35% is somewhat outrageous in an area that charges 8.5% sales tax. So I asked him why so much. He said "tax". I said that tax is 8.5, not 35 percent. His reaction was to remove the milk from the bag he had put it in, place it to the side and then order me out of his store or he would call the police. So I left.

Fast forward to today, and someone recommended online surveys as a possible way of making money. I suspected there was probably something suspicious about them, but I figured I really had nothing to lose, so I signed up for a few of the ones that appeared to be legit. Well, what I soon discovered is that by signing up for one, they really escalate this into signing you up for every one. Now, I'm probably a member of about every survey site you can possibly imagine.

Now, if you've never crossed into this world of surveys, you might get the mistaken impression (like I did) that these surveys are actually interested in your opinion on things, like products or maybe politics or trends, or whatever. They're not. What they're interested in doing is the infamous foot in the door technique and its many variations. Let me give you an example. Blockbuster Online Rentals is one of the ones that almost every one of these surveys has as one of its "surveys". What the survey will do is promise you anywhere from $15-30 for "completing" the survey on Blockbuster. But what the "survey" actually is has nothing to do with surveying. To complete the survey, you have to sign up for Blockbuster's Online service (the one that charges $9.99 + tax per month to have movies sent to you like the MUCH BETTER company Netflix). Having not completed this "survey" because I can see right through its game, I'm assuming that you would then get $15-30 from the survey company (which all tend to have a "you must earn $100 in surveys before we send you a check" clause to them, although that amount varies from $40 to undetermined amounts).

If you start going through more and more of these "surveys", what they are is an endless stream of "click yes or no" to get more information about more companies that want to separate you from your hard to come by dollars. They aren't really interested in your opinion, but in your business. And quite a few of them that I observed are really scary in what they do.

I'll give you an example from the "medical" surveys that I noticed. I know that our country talks about how we're over-medicated these days, but I went through a number of surveys that practically CREATE ailments within me, even when I'm feeling fine. I've had a headache a week ago, so having connected with that information, I'm put through a bunch of self-diagnosing (it diagnosis me, not the other way around) that eventually end up with some pharmaceutical company offering me a 7 day supply of a drug that they want me to take back to my doctor and TELL her this is what I need. If I have diabetes, they want to give me a free blood sugar monitor, but they can only give it to you if you're on medicare, but if you're not, they will walk you through the process of getting ONTO medicare so that they can run the charge through and "NO ONE" has to fork over any money. Yes, I'm sure it comes from nowhere as the government just has way too much money to shell out for these sorts of unnecessary things. I think you get the picture. In about one day, I had "coupons" for 7 or so day supplies of drugs to medicate my ADHD, which I don't have, my insomnia, which is really caused by the fact that my shoulder is injured, not because I need medication to sleep and suffer from ailments that I can't pronounce, all sorts of diabetic medication that is "ground-breaking" and so "ground-breaking" that no one else in the medical establishment appears to know what it is, and my favorite: I've "qualified for medical trials" on at least five different horrific ailments, which will require me to be put into test groups where I might or might not receive life-saving treatment in a ground breaking study. I think you get the idea.

The problem, for me, is that they are preying on people who generally are at wit's end and don't know where else to turn. Instead of helping them, as they are claiming to do, they are turning their lives into a living hell from which they will never escape. You don't help someone solve his financial burden by offering him ten different credit cards (the other thing these surveys have been doing nonstop) from "banks" I've never heard of before. I mean, come on, when I get a credit card offer from Fred's Bank, there's something really wrong here.

But like poverty itself, I don't expect anyone to care. The people who are targeted here are unimportant to the rest of American society. They are the losers in the game of capitalism, and as long as the fantasy of everyone having an equal chance in this country exists, they will continue to be victims, exploited by those who care only about their own wallets. It's like Hurricane Katrina when it happened. We all saw the pictures and wanted to do something. But no matter how many people DID go and help, there were so many people who saw it as an opportunity and swooped down, doing what they always do. And as we rarely hold them accountable (white collar crime never will be, no matter how much rhetoric we use), that's why it will only continue as perpetrators become more and more blatant in how they do it.

And I think that's sad. But what's that matter. It's not like anyone reads a blog like this anyway.

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Tuesday, July 17, 2007

The Perpetual Candidate for President

I was in Carl's Jr. today in Stockton when I made eye contact with one of those "interesting" people who people often say you shouldn't make eye contact with. Well, I was in a curious mood today (seeing as I can't seem to find a job in this city and I'm kind of starving, but that's another story), so I actually responded when he asked me what I did. I said I'm at the University of the Pacific, doing grad work in communication, but my MA and my stalled Ph.D. is in political science. Well, that's when I discovered who he was.

His name is Jerry Carroll, and he's actually a legend in our nation, although most people have no idea who he is. He's been running for president, according to him, about as long as I've been alive. He was telling me how he had a recent run-in with the Stockton Police Department, because they don't seem to "accept" that he's actually a perpetual candidate for the presidency. Anyway, he did hand me his business card (which is actually a red and green imprint on a 3x5 card) that backs up what he says, so this wasn't something he just made up on the spot.

So, for the next hour, I listened to him ramble on about what is important in this country, and his "contributions" to our country. In our conversation, he told me that he got rid of Nixon, in some way involving Watergate. He told me that he put Carter, Clinton, and I believe Reagan into power. I didn't exactly figure out how. He told me he's a surgeon, and he was involved in some really intriguing medical, yet obviously very top secret, procedures that involved the introduction of cyborg technology into his body. He knew EVERYONE at UOP (my school) and named names, like "Smith" and "that other guy". He mentioned Fitzgerald, a writer for the Stockton, and how Fitzgerald accidentally gave him coverage that wasn't supposed to be given (I was assuming Fitzgerald was some kind of opinion editor for the Stockton Record, which Jerry thought I was reading (note: I was reading the San Francisco Chronicle and the Sacramento Bee. Never really got into the Stockton Record as it's not all that impressive of a newspaper, kind of like the Kalamazoo Gazette.)). That coverage Fitzgerald gave was by running a cartoon of Jerry Carroll chasing after the other candidates, and somehow it got national syndication. It could be true. I have no way of knowing.

Anyway, as he was talking, I did find my mind wandering a bit because I've been looking for a character in my recent novel For the People, about a futile presidential run of a military veteran who has been ignored by both major political parties. The more I listened to this guy, the more I realized he was actually the character I was looking for. But I'll deal with that at another time, as I wouldn't use an actual person, but his stories certainly gave me the impetus to think about some other thoughts as well.

So, at home, I decided to search out this guy's name, and supposedly, he's been somewhat famous at doing what he's doing. I don't think anyone has ever actually sat down and talked to him before, because most people talk about him like this ghost character that no one has ever actually seen. I now realize that I've seen this guy MANY times at this particular Carls Jr. I'm probably going to run into him a lot of times in the future now that I know who he is.

Anyway, as I drove off to go check the mail in my PO Box, I saw him standing at the bus stop with his huge duffel bag, waiting for the bus. I really think this is an interesting person that I'm surprised no one else has ever heard of.

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Thursday, July 12, 2007

Updates

Well, those were the first 7 episodes of Stickman. I'm taking a bit of time off to generate some more, and then I should be posting them some time next week. It also takes a bit of time for me to do this because I do not own a scanner, so I have to use the one on campus.

The job hunting is still going, and I've been interviewed more times than anyone should ever have to be interviewed without actually getting a job. From temp agencies to government jobs to regular jobs, I just can't seem to get a lucky break. I ran out of money last week, so things are getting kind of tough. I rationed the food I had into halves, and while I love the fact that I've been losing a lot of weight very fast over the last few weeks, I'm pretty sure this wasn't the way one is supposed to go about doing it. I have over a month and a half to make it, and to be honest, I'm not sure I will.

I wish I had better news to report, but this summer has really sucked. And it's getting kind of worse. I've pretty much run out of options, so it's now an exercise in watching the rest of the world crumble around me.

I'm beyond complaining and feeling sorry for myself. Now, I'm starting to find bizarre humor in the stupidest things. Like health insurance, for instance. School cut my last five paychecks in half to pay for my Kaiser health coverage through the summer, which took away the money I had actually planned to use to survive this summer. Irony is such a fun little animal. My shoulder has been in massive pain all summer long, but I can't afford the $20 co-pay with my insurance in order to get an MRI and then yet another payment probably to get some surgery. So, losing half my income managed to allow me access to my insurance, but losing half my income means I can't afford to access my insurance. It's like paying auto insurance for a car that sits in a garage to which you don't have the key.

Anyway, it's survival of the fittest in this country. I wasn't the fittest.

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Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Stickman #7

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Stickman #6

Monday, July 09, 2007

Stickman #5

Sunday, July 08, 2007

Stickman #4

The whole Stickman thing

I managed to get the comics started. Now, it's just a matter of getting people to be able to see it. At first, one of the feedback problems was that the comics were too small. I've tried to correct that on the main page. We'll see how it works from there. I also added biographies to the first few characters that will be part of the comic strip.

I'm still working hard trying to find a job. I kind of ran out of money, and that really sucks, so I'm not sure what to do until I find an actual job. I guess starving and dying are an option, but I'm hoping for a bit more than that.

I have some processing to do with the National Guard tomorrow evening and Tuesday. I'm much older than when I first served, so I have a strong feeling I'm not going to be able to go that direction.

I also have an interview on Wednesday morning. Actually, I have an interview and a test both at the exact same time on Wednesday morning, so I have decided to choose the job I'd much rather have and attend that interview instead.

Other than that, things are still kind of crappy. My shoulder has been killing me lately, and there are times when I've just thought of giving up completely because after a night of no sleep because my shoulder is throbbing, well, it doesn't leave you a happy camper.

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Saturday, July 07, 2007

Stickman #3

Friday, July 06, 2007

Stickman #2

The start of the adventure

To be honest, I don't even have an opinion on this one

Thursday, July 05, 2007

The Adventures of Stickman and the Unemployed Lego Spaceman


This is my latest project. As you can see from the banner above, I am creating something new. It is going to be a comic strip. I already have 7 episodes of 3-panels completed. Now, I just need to find some way to scan them so that I can place each episode on my computer.

The story is about two main characters: Stickman (a 2-dimensional character) and his friend the unemployed lego spaceman (look at the picture on this web site, and you'll see what he generally looks like). The story begins with the creation of the universe from a single point to the invention of Stickman and then it will evolve to the integration of the lego spaceman.

It may not make a lot of sense yet, but it will when I can get the episodes scanned and put online. For quite some time now, I have been looking for an outlet to use my humor to its best ability, and I've been having a lot of trouble just getting published with my latest novel, a humorous Greek epic, so this is something new for me. And I'm actually pretty happy with the direction this is going.

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Tuesday, July 03, 2007

Continued job hunt

Yes, it continues, and it's not very successful. I've had a number of interviews, but they haven't really led to anything solid. And now I'm stuck with an interesting quandary: Both the City of Stockton and San Joaquin County have scheduled me for interview/examinations on the same day, and both positions are not allowed to be rescheduled. So, I have to decide whether I have a better chance with an administrative analyst position or a deputy public guardian position, and then hope that I made the right choice for the interview.

I also passed the Stockton Police POST test. The background investigator contacted me to start the whole official process, but I'm suspicious of any success here. I've had some problem in my past with credit that have caused me problems on the job front from time to time, and I can see it causing me problems yet again. Unfortunately, I can't do anything about those times, and they keep coming back to haunt me.

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